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Secret Gifted Minds: How a Gifted Person Thinks Differently

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Secret Gifted Minds: How a Gifted Person Thinks Differently

Career Expert Insight into How a Gifted Person Thinks

When you meet a gifted person, you are meeting an individual who brings emotions, feelings, and thinking at a far deeper level than the average person. Take examples of the gifted Elon Musk, Stephen Hawking, Nicole Kidman & Quentin Tarantino all masters in their fields.  They are all gifted individuals who think quite differently from the average.

Below I highlight the start of how a gifted person develops through common thinking traits they all potentially share.

Self-Identity

Most gifted persons grow up not knowing they are gifted until identified in later years at school or through the person pursuing answers as to why they feel different in their lives or careers.

Self-identity usually starts in two ways for the gifted:

Firstly, they usually begin by comparing themselves to others and secondly, they pay very close attention to listening to what others say to them about them. These two things can lead them to judge their self-worth.

If others are positive in their assessment of them, they have a neutral view of themselves. If others criticize and are negative towards them, they plunge themselves into a territory of self-criticism and experience a sense of shame.

This can start in childhood, for example when the gifted child arrives home having achieved well at school but the parent reacts in a negative way. The gifted child starts to equate their personal value based on what they have achieved via their performance. This can continue as they grow into an adult.

Their want to be successful all the time can become very intense and if they don’t achieve success 100% of the time, they continue to have a negative view of themselves.

Feeling Different

From a very young age, the gifted usually are segregated from their peers for certain subject areas in which they naturally excel at. To not be extended in some form would have these youngsters crawling the school walls with boredom.

Regardless of whether you see it as a good idea or not, the gifted need the extension, they see things & feel things differently. When they grasp concepts and excel at their work, their peers can become jealous and the gifted person may feel rejected and have a sense of not belonging.

This can make them feel alone and isolated.

This is no different in the workplace. If the gifted worker is not amongst other gifted employees, they can behave by dumbing themselves down in the hope that they will connect and satisfy the need of belonging to the organisation group.

This is not healthy for the person as they know deep down that their abilities are not valued and their career needs for growth are not met.

Finding the right environment that supports their difference can however be a fine line and requires careful consideration. If a gifted person moves to a work environment that is a better fit, it can also lower their self-esteem if the challenge is too much. Reduced motivation results as well as the want to attempt hard job tasks. It very much depends on the individual and how their concept of self has been built from when they were a child.

If a self-concept starts off negative, further judgments in the workplace that are negative will have their self-worth suffer and their self-view conditioned by others.

As humans, we all want to belong and feel connected. When the gifted feel like an outsider, their desire to apply themselves and achieve personal goals can diminish.

Perfectionism

Thinking you need to do things perfectly is very common among gifted people. This behaviour can again go back to childhood when a child will draw a picture and if they feel it is not good enough will throw it out before anybody sees it.

They avoid getting an adult’s judgment and therefore can avoid perceived criticism of their work. This behaviour follows through to teenage years and many develop later on in life as presenting as gifted adults anxiety.

It is not uncommon for this anxiety to paralyze the child in the later years of high school stopping them from actually sitting the Higher School Certificate.

Concerned that they will make mistakes and their work isn’t to their high standards, can make them feel embarrassed & think they will suffer humiliation. They pay close attention to the expectations of others and anticipate the criticism that may come from them.

Perfectionism can start early with gifted individuals having parents who are perfectionists themselves. These parents are heavily focused on achievement & success and high standards are set early for the gifted child. The standards are so high that they are unrealistic so the individual always feels like a failure unless they do things perfectly.

Growing up with phrases like “Don’t Fail”, and “You can do better” and if they scored 95% a perfectionist parent would ask “What happen to the other 5%?”. Frequent criticism from parents and no opportunities to make mistakes can follow the gifted into the workplace and fear of failure as well as procrastination can be constant companions.

While the gifted adult can be super critical of themselves they too can be critical of fellow employees and their superiors. This is fairly typical in an unchallenging work environment and they find it difficult to maintain long-lasting friendships.

Damaging social relationships at work can be a source of depression for the gifted as they spend the majority of their waking hours at work. The importance of a healthy, challenging, and non-toxic work environment is crucial to the well-being of this group.

The fact that our society reinforces the idea of perfectionism doesn’t help this thinking either.

The media in Australia are big on painting the perfect career, the perfect mother, the perfect relationship, the perfect body, etc as well as our praise of Olympic sporting identities, distinguishing winners & losers. Perceived success on social media more recently has presented another layer to think one needs to have a perfect life and the perfect career.

Creativity

I am yet to meet a gifted person who is not creative. When I refer to creativity, it is not isolated to the arts and crafts arena. Creativity is at the heart of every human being, it’s what we are all meant to do.

For gifted people, their brains are wired to create and innovate. This occupies most of their thought patterns.

Work that does not allow thinking space and creative opportunity can lead to job dissatisfaction and a missed competitive opportunity for the organisation that employs them.

To be creative the gifted always consider a diversity of perspectives and pay great attention to the details that matter. They can look at a complex problem and strip it back to basics to provide a simple yet effective solution.

They enjoy taking risks and thinking of possibilities that others would deem to be impossible. Elon Musk with chief engineer Jerome Guillen is an example of this with the planned release of the innovative Telsa electric semi-truck to cover 500-mile range on one single charge reducing diesel emissions and disrupting the trucking industry as we know it.

Recognition

A fair day’s work equals fair recognition in the eyes of the gifted. Nothing annoys these individuals more than when they are having to pick up the slack of others’ work particularly when they are not considered of equal capability & the other employees don’t care. A strong sense of fairness is a common thought pattern.

Gifted employees will work hard but expect to be recognised for this individual hard work. The academic/sporting or artistic awards they received at school for their high performance are an expectation and constant need they crave in today’s workplace. These awards serve as motivation and recognition to others that their gifts are valued.

Achieving Balance & Job Fit

Gifted people don’t want to settle for a job, they secretly yearn for meaning, making a difference, and challenging work that contributes to something bigger than themselves. They are also aware that achieving a balance of family, friends, and work is part of their immediate career life goals.

Today’s work environment suits these individuals more than ever before. The opportunities to work with flexibility, on particular projects or tasks and to work anywhere in the world can give the gifted opportunities for growth and learning while still achieving work-life balance.

Related: The Gifted Few: Traits of People Who Are Gifted

Thinking around issues of self-worth, being different, perfectionism, achieving creativity and work balance is part of being gifted. Giving a positive inner voice to those issues is important to the well-being of all gifted in our workplaces. If you work with a gifted person, understanding the way they think & feel allows you to develop better working relationships and understand how to increase their motivation at work.

To have others recognise and value their giftedness provides these individuals with the encouragement to keep learning and the desire to contribute to work that makes a difference.

Have you ever worked with a gifted person?

My specialisation is working with gifted people on their career development.

Here are some of the results from gifted adults who have benefited from my Gifted and Talented Career Program:

“Undertaking career coaching with Gina was one of my best decisions when I felt burnt out, confused, and lost after my Ph.D. I can see how this program would benefit everybody because it is a journey of self-discovery, extending horizons, and getting a clear understanding of how to make a strategy (and concrete steps) around the career direction best suited for a particular person.

Gina is a very nice and empathetic person but also a task-oriented person, and her coaching led me to realize what I want to do in my career (different from what I originally thought). It also gave me the confidence I will get there – a type of confidence that a person can only gain from aiming to do what they truly love/value; using their natural talents/skills; and feeling challenged in a good way.” Lada- Sydney

“As an incredibly unhappy lawyer with no idea what to do, I took a leap of faith and made an appointment to see Gina. Four months later and I finally have much-needed clarity about the person I want to be and the career I wish to have.

Gina’s desire to help people find their passion in life is evident from the first minute you meet her. After going through the program, I am left feeling confident and excited about my future.
Thank you Gina for being an incredibly kind, warm, and supportive mentor!” Peter- Sydney

If you are gifted or you work with gifted people, there are two career development programs that can support gifted individuals. Reach out and contact me to learn more.

Written by Gina Bell

Gina Bell is a university-qualified Sydney Career Expert in Career Advice, Career Coaching, and Career Counselling. She also works as a Talent Development Consultant for commercial organisations. She is passionate about aligning a person’s work purpose in a work environment where they can find fulfillment & reach their potential. She specialises in career advice for gifted adults.

Her qualifications include a Graduate Diploma in Career Development, a Graduate Diploma in Chartered Accounting, and a Bachelor of Economics. She is registered with the Career Industry Council of AustraliaProfessional Member of the Career Development Association of Australia, National Career Development Association in the USA, Asia Pacific Career Development Association & Chartered Accountants of Australia and New Zealand.

In her free time, she loves to travel, cook, and learn.

Follow her on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/gina-bell/

8 comments on “Secret Gifted Minds: How a Gifted Person Thinks Differently
  1. I agree with your article but the biggest problem I see being a gifted adult is not having anyone to talk with about deeper meaning or conveying your thoughts and feelings too someone that understands. Especially when your from Oklahoma where the population isn’t so dense.

    Thank you

    Brandon

    • Gina Bell on said:

      Yes, absolutely agree Brandon. When you find like minded gifted individuals, it’s like finding gold. Being misunderstood can be quite isolating for Gifted Adults particularly in the workplace. When you understand your own giftedness, you start to be aware not only of yourself but others that may share the same characteristics leading you to find your tribe. Just like you have found this blog, remember you are not alone, the internet allows us all to be connected and more chance of finding those who can understand those deeper thoughts and feelings.

    • Gina Bell on said:

      Hi Zimri, It really depends on your interest areas. Gifted individuals are known for having very broad interests, read widely and access many different blog sites. A gifted adult knows when they are speaking to another gifted adult. You just click, especially in your interest area. Same goes for blogs etc, search for your interest area and see if the writer resonates with you. Hope that helps.

  2. Courtney on said:

    As a gifted person, I find one of the greatest career challenges (besides being a mother) is the fact that colleagues can feel threatened.
    My ambition is not driven by prestige or glory or raises or achievement. It is driven by personal improvement, growth, learning and applying my expertise. Unfortunately most work politics is driven by the former and insecurity in the face of the unfamiliar is a part of human nature.

    • Gina Bell on said:

      Yes, Courtney you are absolutely correct. Gifted individuals are always working to better themselves to reach their potential and contribute to society in a purposeful way. Thank you for sharing your experience.

  3. Sarab on said:

    How can a gifted person ensure that people understand that their behaviors are a result of an inherent neurodiversity rather than some kind of personality flaw they should be able to easily control? How can they explain the concept of giftedness without further alienating themselves or intimidating others?

    • Gina Bell on said:

      Hi Sarab, great question. Happy to have a private consultation to address this question. Sounds like you may have a story behind the question.

Comments are closed.